NLP Modeling: Clearing the clutter?

I recently came to the conclusion that to be successful, you have to be well-structured and clear. Isn’t that the case? Structure has favored the person in school and in their career. The top student is the most organized. The top executive is the one who systematically plays by all the corporate rules. To a point.

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I believe it is as much a possibility to model after a simple skill like this – but take someone who has never had any structure and expect them to fit into it… and you have a madhouse!

I think we can start simply. Look at the stuff that’s happening around you. If you find yourself disorganized, start categorizing. It takes a little bit of effort, as I found, to be able to do this! A lot of the stuff that I have just didn’t fit in. Actually, I didn’t really know what to do with them.

If your stuff is out of place and you don’t know what to do with them, there’s a tendency to… just leave them there!

That’s the start of clutter. What you have to do is then create a series of Swish Patterns in order to create a shift in the way you respond to your misplaced stuff. That way, you will be more likely to respond in a manner OTHER than just leaving things lying around.

Another thing that I observed is this: since clutter actually is the accumulation of things that don’t belong, you should see the changes when you activate those neurological shifts. See the result in a week or two.

Summary of steps:

Step 1: have a clear idea of what should belong and what shouldn’t

Step 2: decide that you either have a place for it or you don’t.

If you have a place for it, make the mental connection and place it where it belongs.

If you don’t have a place for it, create one called “trash bin”.

Step 3: reduce your tolerance for clutter.

If what you see as clutter has a high tolerance level (say 8/10 or higher), take the same image and change the image so that it becomes a 2/10 or so. Now, your brain is primed to expect a lower level of tolerance and kick start the process of clearing.

Step 4: future pace and check ecology, especially if you end up clearing other people’s clutter, which they may not like. 🙂

NLP Modeling: Expertise in 10,000 hours?

I’ve heard this before in the book by Daniel Goleman called “Destructive Emotions”. We habituate our thoughts through our environment. In one of my YouTube videos, I talked about Triggers. Environment and memory create our somewhat autonomous reactions to sensory triggers. If you were nearly killed in a fire, you would probably have a reaction to fire around you, whether it be adverse or not.

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Our past experiences end up giving us access to opportunities. But the problem with many people is that they seriously lack awareness of their habitual performances. I’ve mentioned in one of my seminars before that being more aware of yourself opens up opportunity for improvement. Your habits could trap you or lead you to excellence. It’s merely a question of what kind of habits you build for yourself.

So… do we really need 10,000 hours to build a skill?

My personal opinion is that 10,000 hours is necessary as a foundational step. If you have NO skill, or have not been practicing anything to improve yourself, there’s going to be a general lack of positive regard for what you do and the meaning behind it.

Your ability to feel that what you are doing is challenging and fulfilling will lead to something called “passion”. I suppose that’s one of the reasons why people think that it’s hard to “find” your passion. You simply haven’t looked at the right places yet! When you start something and begin to enhance your capacity to do that something well (e.g. swim, run, read, write) you end up developing opportunities.

It is these opportunities that will give you new skills to learn and new people to meet. This then offers the higher chance of becoming highly successful in what you do. I like to think of myself as a portal to opportunity. I’ll help bring people to the doors, but they have to walk in there themselves.

Millionaires can be made.

Experts can be created.

The question is… which one comes first: the millionaire or the expert?

I think you probably know the answer to this. It’s your expertise that brings you the millions. If you have no expertise, even if you received a million dollars, it’s going to disappear!

The funny thing is this: after your first 10,000 hours, the next skill or expertise you need to have doesn’t take that long. Possibly 9,000 hours. The more you learn, the less you HAVE to learn later.

Why?

Because domains of knowledge overlap with each other and you can be sure that this is the rule, not the exception. If you don’t have the learning capacity, you are in serious trouble. Others who have this learning edge will stay ahead of the curve and will force you to arrive at a conclusion that you’re too late.

It’s never too late! By being a student and learning, you might actually start finding it addictive. Learn more, build more capacity, increase your awarenss and you’ll find opportunities abound. Take those opportunities and you’ll see success coming in!

NLP Modeling: The Structure Of Responsibility

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I was in a taxicab earlier this week and had the opportunity to listen to my government talk about interesting training incentives for literally everyone. Of course I was happy! It seemed to me that this was exactly what I needed to hear, especially since I’m in the business of training.

The cab driver wasn’t so hot on the news. He said “it’s useless”. What he wanted was a handout – extra cash. All the training, he said, was a waste of time.

Woah!

I can tell why HE’s the one driving the cab now!

If you can imagine for one second that the entire country was like this? That everyone was looking only for handouts rather than to build something of their own. It’s all a question of taking responsibility for one’s current situation.

To take responsibility, it’s necessary to observe the current “ownership” level you have now. Remember – I’m not saying “it’s your fault”. I’m saying take ownership so that you don’t have to point fingers.

Step 1: Think of something in your life that isn’t going right. Disassociate.

Step 2: Ask yourself what you needed in order for that to go right. Remember to take this from the standpoint of ownership rather than blame. If you had to do it all over, what skills and resources would you need?

Step 3: Imagine a future scenario where you were in a similar situation but with the appropriate skills and resources. Would your reflection in Step 2 be sufficient, or do you need more resources? Go back to step 2.

Step 4: Create a list of steps you need to do in order to ensure you come up to speed. It may be taking action on a skill you must build, or a commitment you must act upon, etc.

Step 5: See yourself doing it, then start doing it!

Test this and let me know what you think.

NLP Trainer Singapore: Stuart Tan

Looking for an NLP Trainer in Singapore? Well, you probably should get in touch with me. I’ve been probably the longest training NLP Trainer in this part of the world, 15 years of training experience, a REAL background in psychotherapy, counseling and linguistics with several REAL accolades (I’m a best selling author, a recognized authority in training in Singapore) to back me up (not just theory). If you’re keen to receive authentic and expansive NLP training in Singapore, look me up and we’ll chat about how your certification and licensing could bring you a long way.

If you are in another part of the world, I’m still waiting for people to bring me over… wherever you are! *hint hint*

Learn NLP: Character Instead Of Cash

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Do you desire financial freedom and fame?  If you do, I have news for you.  NLP can help you model after those successes!  However, you might have a lot of catching up the, not just in financial success, but also in terms of knowing where you are where you ought to go. If you’re one of those people who have great financial success, but are complete jerks, don’t read this. I have people whom I care about whom I want to succeed, not you.

So guys… you want success. Yet, some people have great financial success but are these blamers, whiners and complainers. They are rich in cash, but poor in character. Somehow, these morons seem to get away with it, don’t they? It seems somewhat unfair, that they have it and you don’t.

If you are hardworking, honest, and have a sense of responsibility in the things that you do, all it takes is a little fire and passion and drive you toward greater success. I think these are the things that are necessary for you to forge ahead and build any kind of success that you want. But you must be willing to take the hits.

The worst thing that can happen for you is that you ONLY take credit for everything that goes right, and fail to improve from the things that don’t go right. Take responsibility. When I mean responsibility, I’m really talking about the ability to take charge of one’s own decisions, instead of blaming someone else and making excuses. If you don’t achieve something, for heaven’s sake don’t blame anyone else for it.

You need to learn this. Responsibility is one of the most important key facets in NLP. I found that accepting responsibility actually a allows you to develop a greater sense of learning through feedback.

So, if you’re not wealthy yet, take responsibility!

If you don’t have a great family yet, take responsiblity!

If people don’t like you yet, take responsibility!

If you were made bankrupt…(the list goes on, by the way)

Learn something from it.

Once you take a look inside yourself instead of outside of yourself and looking for something to blame, you’ll find that there’s a lot more that you can do to grow as a human being. You become more fulfilled, and experience a greater sense of lightness so that things get better in all aspects of your life.

The basic strategy for taking responsibility is to observe all comments, a visual stimulus, or any other form of sensory feedback and process that by asking the question: “what could I do to improve this?”

The moment you ask this question, it presumes that you already have a clear enough outcome. For most people, the outcome is unclear. You definitely want to have some clarity of your outcomes in order to know how to exactly improve. Once you’re there, you can activate resources that lead you to where it is that you need to go.

I certainly hope that you focus on character instead of cash, wisdom instead of fame, integrity instead of blame.  I know that once you’re there, it will definitely help you to make yourself as cash rich and famous as you choose to be. 

NLP Techniques: How To Put Someone Into The State Of Relaxation

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Most people who are familiar with NLP are able to put other people into a deep state of relaxation. In order for you to know how to do this effectively, you need to understand the use of the Milton model.

Milton Erickson, it is frequently referred to as one of the pillars of NLP. Richard Bandler and John Grinder modeled after Erickson’s approach to hypnosis. And all they did was extract the linguistic categories in his language patterns! The overall result is an astonishing work that has transformed ordinary people into extraordinary hypnotists.

Relaxation is an emotional state that requires individuals to be aware of their body. Very often, the process of deep relaxation requires the initiation of breathing patterns that are different from the current state that they are in. Once you engage in individual in breathing deeply through their nails and breathing out through their mouths, they will begin to regulate their patterns of breathing. This automatically changes their emotional state based on physiological regulation.

The process of pacing and leading is therefore used in order to utilize the physiological change. Phrases such as “as you notice your breathing”, “listening to the sound of my voice”, and “feeling the sensations in your body”, are statements that any individual listening to them cannot deny as an untruth. As such, they are pacing and utilization statements.

In order to deepen states of relaxation, simply link these to suggested outcomes. Read things, “as you notice your breathing, you can begin to go deeper into a state of absolute relaxation”.

This is the reason why most people mistakenly associate NLP with hypnosis. NLP practitioners merely developed the modeling capacity to reverse engineer should notice on their own. For more information about NLP and hypnosis, simply it down to www.WorldofNLP.com.

Stuart's NLP Modeling Protocols

It has come to my attention that many neurolinguistic experts are propagating NLP in the form of its applications.  While this is not a bad idea, because it definitely is more commercially viable, it creates confusion in the marketplace.

How many of you actually saw that NLP was a motivational training program?  Or maybe, it was something to do with pop psychology?  In reality, NLP is none of these.  It can be literally everything you wanted to be.  And that is why, this article was written to help make clear the fact that NLP is all about modeling someone’s expertise.

Now, I’m not talking about modeling as in catwalks.  What’s more specifically important for the process of modeling mastery is understanding how the human psychology works.  I need to know what’s going on inside your mind.  The only way for me to do this is to observe your behavior, listen to your language use, and also the kinds of reactions you have in relation to the rest of the world around you.

Various protocols in modeling.  Each of these protocols will help define how you process the model itself.

1 Awareness: develop sensory acuity, modeling models.

We first need to be aware of the things around us, especially of patterns of behavior in our models. This can be done by using sensory training systems. In fact, there are more senses (including infrared sensing, vestibular sensing) that contributes to our reality. Without a proper training system, you would be less intuitive, less flexible in your responses, let along create change in others.

2 Recognition: Identify and recognize role models and results

How do you know who your role models are? Start looking. Perhaps you will even find some role models right under your nose because you didn’t consider them as such. Just remember that anyone who is achieving some result better than you can be considered a role model.

3 Outcome: Why is it that you want to model after this person?

This is an important question. Your outcome, values and what is important to you will drive you to learn how to do this so that you are committed to it, rather than having a skill half-baked.

4 Triggers: What gets it started?

Every human behavior is triggered off by the external surroundings and mediated by internal processes. To get a complete modeling blueprint, you must have awareness of the triggers that initiated those processes. They are sensory in nature and are part of a domino effect of mental processes we are not really aware of.

5 Chunking: What are the parts of this model?

In understanding chunking, a model often does not give you clear directions in terms of what to do unless you control the responses. You must know how to break the overall strategy into parts in order to have a logical flow of ideas and processes. Without this, you have lots of ‘content’ but no ‘context’ that you can have a clear application on.

6 Sequencing: How do the parts connect? Do I see anything missing?

As with any process, you need to ensure that the mental blueprints are connected properly. Without the correct flow between chunks of the mental blueprint, you often end up with gaps and have to speak to your model again.

7 Metaphor: What metaphor is this model like?

This is something I might do to get a richer map of the experience. A model who is able to provide a deeper, richer map will give me finer distinctions of their mental blueprint. So, it’s different “being a good golfer” compared with a “champion of the green”.

8 Contrast: How does this strategy of excellence compare with a mediocre one?

You need to sometimes make comparative explorations. If someone is good at cooking, what is it benchmarked against? If you have comparative data, ask the model to analyze that and find out what the difference is between this level of performance compared with his/hers.

9 Evidence: How do I know I’m doing it right?

In NLP, we talk about evidence procedures. Everyone has a map of the world that filters information. You simply need to filter it correctly (i.e. are all the things that need to be present in my strategy) to know you are “good” at doing this skill.

10 Stakeholders: Who are stakeholders involved in this?

This may be an odd question, but it points to the NLP concept of ecology. Who is important in the modeling process? After all, sometimes, you have systemic involvement that enhances performance of some kind (e.g. team spirit, a supportive spouse, etc).

11 Stakeholder evidence: How do they know I’m doing this right?

Again, this is an evidence procedure that is based on an ‘external’ outsider’s viewpoint. You may not always get this because the individual might not have external feedback. Still, it is useful to be able to get some input if you can.

12 Barrier: What obstacles might there be?

Obstacles are stoppages toward the completion of a strategy. Identifying these will give you awareness of the level of flexibility you need to execute the strategy effectively.

13 Feedback: What do I do when I meet these obstacles?

This is a follow up on #12 where you need to have substrategies that enable you to stay on your path toward your outcome.

14 Exceptions: Any exceptions to the model? Counter examples?

This question will give you possible segways out of the current model. It can offer some shortcuts or conditional factors that allow you to reach your goal faster.

15 Installation: internalizing the model

This part is all about putting the model’s blueprint into your unconscious. Just as language is unconscious, you want to turn the new model’s behavior into something so effortless that you reach a level of expertise.

Again, whatever is mentioned here is merely the surface of the overall map. To gain more expertise, you definitely need someone to guide you and demonstrate the finer elements of modeling.

Milton Model: Nominalizations

Nominalizations are at the heart of modeling. It was once said that in order to model people, we need to focus on the de-nominalization in language in order to move “things” into “process”. A nominalization is basically an abstract noun (empowerment, love, essence, endearment, optimism, desire, etc) which encapsulates a process. This has an uncanny effect of turning it into a ‘thing’ and causes us to treat it as if it were a thing.

Dr. Vinya Lecturing in Japan
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For instance, people who say “we have a problem with our relationship” will end up having no apparent solution. But when we de-nominalize the term ‘relationship’ we now have a process that is called ‘relating’. Now, this is something we can observe and even learn to improve.

Whenever I interview a role model for the modeling process, I actually request for details about the nominalizations (of course I won’t say ‘denominalize this’) and I end up being clearer about the processes he or she has in her mind.

As an exercise, just list down as many nominalizations you can think of on a sheet of paper, and learn to detect them in your conversations.